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*straight white guy voice* how is that offensive?
*doesn’t check bank account*
*pretends everything is fine*
fuCK, the new joyce manor album is so great, im alone in my room and i just started fake sobbing about it because it is that perfect.
cop: who the hell ordered all these pizzas
me: you said i got one phone call
cute date idea: smash my skull in with a large rock and end my worthless life
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